Stuffed

It seems to me that as a culture we are generally very bad at knowing what it is that we want when we feel that we want something. I wonder why this is.

Perhaps we introspect too little? Because of being busy? Because of being distracted by constact noise and immages? Because people who spend quiet time alone are considered boring and strange? Because somehow we don't know how to keep our own company and feel compelled to always be out with others in order to have a good time? Because we are afriad of discussing deep personal things, like inner desires, with these others we spend our time with? Who knows.

Or perhaps because we are constantly subjected to being told that we want things from commercials and other sales tactics. So that either we aren't used to coming up with the answer of what we want ourselves, having it always told us from the outside, or we are constantly having the feeling of want arroused so that we begin to deal with it almost subconciously so that we can get on with other things. Instead of pausing every time to determine whether the source of the want is within or coming from without, and analysing what exactly we are in want of, we have a set of automatic fullfillment responces which can be selected with little thought or energy.

Thus our lives become overstuffed with fillers while still remaining relatively empty. In fact, sometimes the things that do fullfill us get pushed away or disconnected from our lives just to make room for more stuffing.

Such quick-fix stuffings are frequently food of various kinds, or money, or stuff that one buys through un-premeditated shopping. And here we come to, what I think is, the reason why we see the 'inexplicable' despare and emptiness of people living in a land where even the homeless have more things than could be brought on a plane without an extra fee, where obesity is found even among (and possibly especially among) the poor classes, where there is such abundance of physical provision far beyond the basic needs for survival. It would seem that people are taught culturally to ignore their true desires and inner needs in favor of the misguided persuit of Stuffing.

Moneysworth

very wise saying No.4: the value is in the enjoyment and benefit, not in the quantity.

people are often befuddled by numbers or quantities into thinking that they need to get more in some physical ammount for the price they pay, when really they are cheating themselves.

Take Disneyland for example. The typical Disneyland experience usually encludes trying to do as many things as possible in the time that one has there so that you 'have gotten your money's worth' after paying for those expensive tickets. However, this approach usually makes people more stressed, more cranky, more prone to finding dissatisfaction in their experience, and much more tired and sore. It also probably distracts them from the details of their surroundings or the quality of the experience at hand, so that their sense of satisfaction comes not from the pleasant atmosphere, or the enjoyment of the rides and shows, or the sights and smells and tastes, but rather from being able to check so many things off the list.
• One can achieve the same feeling marking off a list of chores to do at home which costs nothing.
There is certainly a sense of satisfaction when one completes a number of things, but this is entirely a separate thing from the sense of satisfaction one is intended to experience from going to Disneyland. The music and landscaping are meant to create a pleasant atmosphere, one of both peace and joy. The rides are meant to bring up fond memories of movies and stories one loves, or to provide a thrill through speed and motions that one doesn't normally encounter. One is more likely to have a good time - a time that is enjoyable, uplifting, relaxing...in short an escape to a fantasy world, a retreat, if one is not fretting about how long things are taking or how many rides one has yet to check off the list. Why on earth would you pay to go be crabby stressed and resentfull?

People often approach situations in which they pay for something as though they are trying to get a toy out of a dog's mouth. There they are pulling and shaking and straining to get something back as the dog is clenching it's teeth and pulling and straining to keep it. In reality, you pay for something and it is given to you. Why strain as though you have to try and make something of it? Why not just recieve it? Why not focus on What, rather than How Much.

Take as another example: Eating Out. If you feel compelled to 'get your moneysworth' (yes I'm intentionally using it as one word) by eating every last scrap on your plate and having them bring extra bread too if it's not an additional charge, then you will end up feeling overstuffed and miserable, and furthermore that food will be contributing not so much to your health, but to your Unhealth. You have clearly not gotten a better value through eating too much. It is the enjoyment of the eating experience that makes the price worth it. If you eat two bites of something that tastes fabulous and you savor each one, you have gotten much more out of the price you payed, than if you distractedly or quickly stuff the whole thing into your mouth and finnish it off. So what if you throw some of it away! Wasn't it worth the flavor? Wasn't it worth the pleasant feeling you walked away with? Whyever would one pay to be made sick? WhyEver would you pay to be made SICK?

Another way in which the delusion that quantity = quality cheats people is the tendancy to be willing to spend more money on a number of small/trivial things than they would have spent on one 'large' purchace of something they really wanted. The appearance of 'low prices' distracts people from looking at how much they are actually spending, and the number of new things feels, in the moment, more satisfying, than only one new thing, regardless of how little importance those many things may actually have to them. Thus instead of getting what they want most, people settle for a bunch of things they only sort of want, and seem to think that this is better. In the mean time they continue to pine away for the 'big' things they actually want, whereas the small things they came home with would most likely have been forgotten in a couple of days if they had not bought them....and sometimes even if they did.
Some people take this moneysworth delusion even further by buying things that they would otherwise never have thought to buy, simply because they are on sale. They are tricked into thinking they are 'getting a good deal' when they are, in fact, completely throwing away their money.

As Sabrina says: "More isn't always better, Linus. Sometimes it's just more."

Alice in Wonderland

Very wise saying No. 2: Sugar is not the answer to lack of fulfillment and happiness.

Very wise saying No. 1: Shiney objects do not equal fulfillment and success.

*meanders off singing "I give to myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it..."*

(remember that song from Alice in Wonderland?)

mmmmmmmm honey.....^_______^

sometimes I get cravings for honey. I think I'm like Pooh Bear in quite a few ways including a love for honey ^.^ I love to just sit with a jar of it and dip my fingers in and eat it plain like that, yummmm!