Morning Sickness

I am not what you would call a ‘morning person.’ It’s not so much a matter of getting up on the wrong side of the bed with me, as getting up on the wrong side of the stomache. Whenever I’ve had less than 9-10 hours of sleep (which is hard to come by in this world) I invariably feel as though I am going to puke. This goes on for a good while after I have actually managed to lug myself out of bed and out of the house. Mostly the whole of my thought processes and strength are taken up with ‘I will not puke, I will not puke, I will not fall over, I will not puke...’ On top of this I am also very light sensitive and my eyes have a tendancy to be blurred for about half an hour. Bright lights trigger wincing headaches and the inability to open my eyes whatsoever. All I want to do upon waking up is curl up in a dark hole and die.
Now if you felt like this do you immagine you would be inclined to outbursts of smiling and cheerfull comments? No. I don’t think so.
Now, I wouldn’t necessarily call myself grumpy: I don’t develope that urge to slash things to smitherines unless someone else throws on the lights and acts inhumaely happy. If you walk around with half lidded eyes and comment only in grunts you are perfectly safe. Aside from the physical pangs I can actually be resonably happy - on the inside. Outward expression capabilities do not develope till later in the day, and social inteaction is prettymuch null. It seems that something got wired wrong in may brain - generally the longer I’ve been awake the more awake I become, and the longer I’ve been asleep the tired-er I become. So just before getting up I’m practially dead. Now that is quite a shock, being flung suddenly from the depths of subconciousdom into the bright aliveness of ‘reality’. I’m never ready for it, no matter how many mornings I’ve braved in the past. It usually takes a good 2-3 hours to get over it and actually get past the ever sluggish ‘start up’ mode. (The unhappy mac icon usually threatens to appear several times before the processing wheel finally disappears and the desktop picture comes up). During the first half of the day thinking is very limited. Life is pretty much just going through the motions with a glazed look. Full functionality is reached sometime after diner when my internal motivator finally begins to kick in.