the grand scheme

"Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?"

So we had this mandatory morning meeting from HELL. Some block-head decided the way to boost moral and spread Christmas cheer and enthusiasm was to drag everyone out of their beds before 7AM on a Saterday and make them play dumb games with a very pop-quizzish slant to them. However, God is good, even if it's not always to me. As I left the house I came upon a little worm writhing on the already dry pavement with a few ants crawling on him.
'Never fear! I shall save thee little bug!'
I scooped him up on a leaf and put him down in the midst of nice moist soil he could snuggle down into. Yes, God even cares about little worms...enough to boot me out of bed snarling and hissing. So maybe, when you(or I) need someone, He'll boot somebody else out of bed too. Somehow, as horrible as that morning was, it was all worth it, because one life was saved, even if it was only a worm's. When things aren't going your way, when all your world looks grey, maybe this moment isn't about you, maybe it's about someone else, maybe it's about a little worm frying in the sun. I guess He really was doing something for me though, I don't regret that day afterall. heh.

ok that was really sappy, but...*shrug*

Rachmoninov’s second piano concerto

The more I listen to it the more I like it.
I love the begining of the first movement after the initial piano when the strings join all heavy and dark and thick.
The seccond movement has one of the most tender sadly-sweet melodies I’ve ever heard. It’s so beautifull, during the begining part I have to pause and close my eyes and soak it in like a sponge* that has been in the desert. I can hardly help crying sometimes from the beauty of it.

If you get a chance listen to it and tell me what you think.

*I'm thinking ocean sponge, as in live animal sponge. But not as in Sponge Bob.

like talking with your mouth full at a nice restaraunt

reading certain books in public can be hazardous to your pride and social standing. ...well at least if you read like I do. I get very involved with the characters and react outloud. I make faces, giggle, squeal with delight, talk back, sometimes read aloud, and generaly interact with the book. Say...if one of the characters is being particularly stupid I will often roll my eyes and hit my forhead with the book, if something happens that I predicted I exclaim triumphantly, if something really happy happens I will bounce up and down and grin exstatically, etc. So....when walking or sitting in a public place this can draw some very unwanted attention. heh. like today. I had to put away my book as I walked home because I could tell I was gearing up towards making quite a scene on state street. You ask what book? I'm on the 8th volume of Hana-Kimi, a cute sappy romantic comedy manga.

Ulitmate Dorkdom

...the ongoing saga of the bloody cold.

So this morning I get up and lug myself off to work in the cold morning air and about three blocks from my house my nose starts to bleed, actually gush would be the best word to describe the event. I stop to get some kleenex from my purse and as I look down my dress now has several red stripes, lucky it's sort of a redish purple already. Now, if any of you remember it, I was wearing that purple swirly patterned 'eowyn' style dress I made a while back, but because it was cold I had my sweatshirt on over it - bad fashion choice, but I was sick and cold and tierd, and to top it off I was also wearing a pastel rainbow colored scarf because it happened to be the one that was out, and it's the snuggliest one I have anyway, so yeah, I looked pretty dorky when I left the house, but now I've got blood down the front of me and a couple of dry kleenexes ain't gonna fix it. I've got bigger things to be worried about though, like how not to leave a bloody red trail down the pavement. So there I am walking down the street in the morning sun with a soggy red kleenx pressed to my nose, held high so that instead of running down my hand into my sleve it's running down my throat, and my other hand pinching the bridge of my nose to try and stem the flow....which...isn't....working. I walk all the way to work looking like a complete dork, muttering curses on my nose, and leave a lovely bloodstained fingerprint on the bell by the door. My nose is still bleeding. The manager comes and lets me in. I explain. It's still bleeding. She turns on the faucet so I can wash my hands and get a wet rag without leaving more evidence. ....And it's still bleeding. She takes care of the first delivery guy. And I sit on the stool holding my nose like some kid in the principle's office who got in a fight, only I don't look angry and pouty, I look dull and miserable, and wondering if I can 'call in sick' on account of a bloody nose.

nose...running...red

yup...I've got a cold. I've been calling it 'allergies' for a week now, but my denial tactic doesn't seem to have worked.
I think my subconcious must be trying the old bloodletting treatment because I can't even count how many times I've had a bloody nose today. I'm sick of blowing it, but if I don't my head feels like it's going to explode. I think I've been through two boxes of kleenex today. I think the sinus medicine dries out the nasal pasages a bit too well and that's why it's bleeding all the time, ...or I just blow too hard, heh. Anyway it seems I have two choices it can run clear or it can run red, either way it's still running, ugh. Good thing I like pretty red on white =) If I were my mom I'd be passed out.
It's actually kind of nice though when I'm just laying here feeling all limp and snuggly surrounded by my two fuzzy moss green blankets.
I just thought I'd share the joy with y'all =)

Fuzzy Dreams

I recently had a dream in which I found a little beetle sized bunny with pink irridescent wings scampering about in some clover. It was sooo cute! I took it home with me and fed it veggies and it grew up to be a normal sized bunny, all white and furry and cuddly - with pink shimmery wings.
Then I had another dream in which I was playing with a really fuzzy little animal that looked kind of like a cross between a penguine and a polar bear cub. It didn’t have a beak and it was fluffy but it was colored like a penguin and had flipper like wings. It was so cute how it waddled around on the snow drifts.
I guess I must have been feeling particularly snug and cuddly or something. =)
sigh, I like happy dreams.